Sugar Shack 59: Rickshaw: The Inner Void
If you’re like me, and have gotten used to the control-freak high-maintenance Exiles like the Weaver and The Jeweler, you’re in for a big shock with this. Facing (at 90, 1, -300 in Kaede) the phlegmatic Sisters of Fate, oblivious to the spray of water dousing him from the nearby fountain, Rickshaw never seems to know what’s going on. He wins, hands down, for the sloppiest Exile in any neighborhood, from the tatty hat to the out-of-step shoes. Obviously, he shops at Goodwill on its off days. In fact, in his obtuse cluelessness, he’s right up there with Pepper and (less entertainingly) with Rose. When you show up, he says nothing about his story, or who he is or what he cares about. He just asks you to go run an errand. It’s like walking into your father’s study, and he gives you something to go mail. I took an instant dislike to him. He should have been one of the first Exiles I worked with, instead of one of the last; I’d have been more forgiving.
1. Mistaken Identity
“Hi, can you deliver something for a contact of mine?” That’s how it starts: full of soul and connection. Rickshaw’s slapdash, slipshod approach to his affairs is nowhere more evident that on this first mish. He gets the name wrong! Then when you arrive, you are greeted by a haughty Elite Guard who takes one look at you and sneers, “Feh. You don’t look like you belong here, pansy”. Most likely, he saves this for anyone working for Rickshaw. Eventually you connect with someone who knows nothing of Rickshaw or your mission, but demands to know your “sponsor”. Rickshaw’s feedback is: “Sure, fine, whatever. Hurry!” You have stumbled into a game played by Exiles, wherein they try to kill each other! The name is Exiles Underground Games (perhaps a reversal of the ancient, ancient GUE). It seems like something they’d play with paintball, if the paint was replaced by hot lead. Survive and you’re done. Rickshaw mumbles some barely articulate thanks. This time I counted my money twice, mindful of his sloppy approach to everything. After all, maybe he would overpay.
2. Let the Games Begin
You make a delivery to one Caroline, identified as the leader of the Sisters of Fate. The Step-Sisters of Fate might be a better name, since their leader has fallen under the sway of your ultimate target in this mish, the Ventriloquist, who uses her to send you off on a side-quest for a CD (a trance dance mix, I think). You victory over him frees her, and sets you up for your next adversary, the Necromancer. A little predictable, but not a bad mish at all.
3. Replay
An “operative” of Rickshaw’s, with a desired device, needs help. After a skirmish, you find out that she is dead. This sends you to the next scene, with Rickshaw crying “Kill more people! Go! Kill!”. You discover that your adversary in this mission, the Necromancer, has revived and controls the operative, now a resurrected automaton that he sends to fight you. Eventually you put them both down, but it was an unsavory first to be killing undead Exiles for the sake of a repugnant game. On the other hand, it was quite satisfying for me to send the Necromancer to join his unwilling servants in the chilly sludge of the Source.
4. Out of Bounds
You may recall that your dossier from last time at the end identified your next target as the Chameleon. Since this meant he could be anyone, it made things quite easy! Once again the careless Rickshaw wails about his “stolen stuff” (how like a child!). This time your contact has a search of his own, for the “White Knight Virus” (an allusion to the Chessman that is not developed at all). You know how this goes. Break in, firefight, loot, and off to meet your contact. Your contact, predictably, is the Chameleon, and attacks you. When I phoned Rickshaw, breathless, he cut me off abruptly- “You got all my stuff back?” I was mightily temped to hurl it in the river.
But wait! There was some gold here! One contact looked at me, took a long drag on a scented smoke, and reflected “Humans hurt Exiles because they fear us. Exiles hurt each other because they fear everything.” Great thought to ponder long after the game has run its dolorous course.
5. Game Over?
In this mish, you simply start by getting some lost plans from a safe, at which point you are pulled into your confrontation with the main adversary in this episode: Agent Lee and his minions. Agent Lee is quite engaging, and rather than fight invites you to take a chance with him and his two assistants. Give one of them the plans, and the door she represents is unlocked. Inevitably you get a fight, not a safe harbor. Just as inevitably Lee and his team engage you. As their banter suggests, Lee is (Big Spoiler coming!)…the Gambler, and aims to win at your expense. The dialog is well done, and there’s more characterization in this encounter than in everything Rickshaw does. In fact, “Agent Lee” deserves his own suite of missions!
At the end, among the smoking, coding corpses, you alone stand alive to tell the tale. You, that is, and Rickshaw, who blurts “I like you, Sugaree! You do good work!” before he sinks into surfeited silence. At least he paid me.
Bugs?: In a couple of the missions I noticed that the text displayed out of order. That is, at the end I would read my operator’s comments on what someone had said before I read the statements being commented on.
Conclusion: The concept of Exiles playing games with each other is ingenious. The observations about them and their motivations are unique. The plot machinations and speech of each adversary are well-done. In fact, they’re far more engaging than sleezeball Rickshaw! And I liked the way you seem to stumble into the whole thing, reminiscent of The Game or even North by Northwest. These are all great strengths. On the other hand, Rickshaw as a character has nothing going for him: no backstory, no alliances or motivation. And the way he dresses! Getting missions from a vending machine would be about as personal and personable as this. His frenetic behavior covers up an inner void and bad teeth.
Afterthought: I felt so anxious in my skin throughout the rush of Rickshaw’s pointless tasks. Everything was touched with foreboding. Only as I turned my back on him for the last time did it occur to me that a single Exile remained for me to do. And as much as I dreaded it, the end of the Exiles was fast approaching for me.
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Sunday, May 06, 2007
Sugar Shack 58: Yuusuke Akayama and the Great Wall’s Great Fall
In a certain not-very accessible byway of Shirakaba, stands Yuusuke Akayama (222, -4, 136). He looks like one of us: the open-necked shirt, the long coat, the dark eyes, and his world-weary expression. It’s easy to feel close to him; he’s just trying to run his business, like everyone else. He’s the owner of the Paper Tiger Restaurant, and has a professional interest in knowing what is going on in his neighborhood, and what might affect his customers, suppliers and competitors. Like the Merovingian, he likes to traffic in information, and hates the thought that anything is happening that he doesn’t know about. Hence his abiding interest in the Great Wall Security Agency. They seem so easy to spot. They seem to have a hand in so many things. They’re easy enough to spot, since there’s always a few of them hanging around Mr. Akayama, either to taunt him, or keep an eye on him. Perhaps this near-constant surveillance accounts for his need of outside contractors. Someone off their radar. Someone subtle. Someone who gets his message without it being spelled out on a blackboard. Someone like you.
1. In the Belly of the Beast
This simple, cakewalk mish seems to be a test more than anything else. You simply need to get a disk for him with a recording of a clandestine conversation. The only challenge is finding a recovery reboot disk, since at your first logon attempt the computer kills itself. This is the easiest Exile mish I can remember since Sister Margaret’s first few!
2. Debug
For this scarcely more challenging lesson, you need to plant a virus (we should more properly call it malware). To achieve this, you need to get access to a computer surrounded by Great Wall staff. The challenge is that the person who can expedite this needs to be paid off, but helpfully notes that the guards often carry cash. Pay him off, plant the bug, and you’re done!
Bug?: After I killed the guards, two of them had money. After I paid the bluepill, both packets of cash were gone. After I paid him, I got a good work message from my operator before the bluepill had given me the code. Don’t know if this is a bug or simply non-elegant.
3. Tearing Down the Wall
“Ah, my new friend” purred the savvy Akayama when I showed up. I had to smile. We had an understanding. He needed a Great Wall outpost wiped out, to…distract them from his own operations. Just go to the target and kill everyone there. Easy enough.
Bug?: However, several times, I got to the site, killed the three guards I found, and found a single door which I could not open. Strangely, in each case, after I aborted the mish, suddenly I could open the door. Unfortunately, I could only view the details of the three guys inside. There was no option to talk or fight. Technically, I think this is what they call a bug.
On the fourth or fifth attempt, this time running it with someone else, I was able to kill all the guards (same as before, from my point of view) and a magnetically-sealed door then opened, and we found three higher-level thugs inside, planning some mischief. We killed two, talked with the survivor, and got three hitlists of targets. These we then took to an associate of Akayama’s, who took one list and had us give the other two lists to two others in the room (including one wearing a stovepipe chef’s hat!), one of whom commented, “Mr. Akayama doesn’t pay me to read”. That’s between him and you, pal!
4. Insecurity
The Great Wall Security organization continues to annoy Mr. Akayama. Now he wishes you to escort a contractor spammer to a Great Valley office so she can spam a list of known hackers, to annoy them and attract their eldritch wrath to the Great Wall network.
After this, you escort her to another associate of Akayama’s for safekeeping. The problem with the escort mission is not the Great Wall attackers who seek to thwart you. It’s trying to find your way over the walls, canals, staircases, lattices, and physical obstacles which bar your way. Naturally, with an escort in tow, you can’t just hyperjump a straight line. I mean, that would be too easy. The dialog with the spammer, her protector, and their security staff at the end is entertaining; make sure to talk to everyone before and after dropping her off.
5. Link Death
With the collective wrath of hackers trashing the network infrastructure of Great Wall Security, they’re weak. This means it’s the right time to hit them hard, and Mr. Akayama directs you to an outpost of Exiles in their service. After they’ve been laid waste, you find a cell phone, whose recent calls direct you to a larger Great Wall Security office. When we rolled in, there were around a dozen (!) Great Wall uniforms waiting, ranging in level from 50-52 (and this mish was on medium!). This led to a long, hard fight, reminiscent of some fights with massed simulacra in Pandora Box missions.
At the end, Mr. Akayama is thrilled. He’s been able to deal Great Wall a deep, lasting blow in his region. And he effuses at your great success! He invites you to “stop by my restaurant some day: the Paper Tiger. Your abilities and initiative are truly commendable, and you may be able to find further employment for them through the influential patrons who frequent my humble establishment”. Mighty warm words from a lasting friend, and word of mouth advertising like this is something that money can’t buy. I’m making my reservations tomorrow.
Conclusion: After so many missions where the Exiles mixed thanks with scorn, or paid me off dismissively, or nagged during and after missions, it was a pleasure to find someone appreciative. Nonetheless, the apparent bugs in missions 2 and 3 were truly annoying.
Thanks go to Xboxster, Stanislava, AgtWeezer, and Sattakan for their help with these missions. I doubt I could have finished it at all without their help. And even if I had, it would not have been nearly as much fun.
This review may be found sat manifoldmischief.blogspot.com, along with dozens of other reviews and writings relevant to MxO.
1. In the Belly of the Beast
This simple, cakewalk mish seems to be a test more than anything else. You simply need to get a disk for him with a recording of a clandestine conversation. The only challenge is finding a recovery reboot disk, since at your first logon attempt the computer kills itself. This is the easiest Exile mish I can remember since Sister Margaret’s first few!
2. Debug
For this scarcely more challenging lesson, you need to plant a virus (we should more properly call it malware). To achieve this, you need to get access to a computer surrounded by Great Wall staff. The challenge is that the person who can expedite this needs to be paid off, but helpfully notes that the guards often carry cash. Pay him off, plant the bug, and you’re done!
Bug?: After I killed the guards, two of them had money. After I paid the bluepill, both packets of cash were gone. After I paid him, I got a good work message from my operator before the bluepill had given me the code. Don’t know if this is a bug or simply non-elegant.
3. Tearing Down the Wall
“Ah, my new friend” purred the savvy Akayama when I showed up. I had to smile. We had an understanding. He needed a Great Wall outpost wiped out, to…distract them from his own operations. Just go to the target and kill everyone there. Easy enough.
Bug?: However, several times, I got to the site, killed the three guards I found, and found a single door which I could not open. Strangely, in each case, after I aborted the mish, suddenly I could open the door. Unfortunately, I could only view the details of the three guys inside. There was no option to talk or fight. Technically, I think this is what they call a bug.
On the fourth or fifth attempt, this time running it with someone else, I was able to kill all the guards (same as before, from my point of view) and a magnetically-sealed door then opened, and we found three higher-level thugs inside, planning some mischief. We killed two, talked with the survivor, and got three hitlists of targets. These we then took to an associate of Akayama’s, who took one list and had us give the other two lists to two others in the room (including one wearing a stovepipe chef’s hat!), one of whom commented, “Mr. Akayama doesn’t pay me to read”. That’s between him and you, pal!
4. Insecurity
The Great Wall Security organization continues to annoy Mr. Akayama. Now he wishes you to escort a contractor spammer to a Great Valley office so she can spam a list of known hackers, to annoy them and attract their eldritch wrath to the Great Wall network.
After this, you escort her to another associate of Akayama’s for safekeeping. The problem with the escort mission is not the Great Wall attackers who seek to thwart you. It’s trying to find your way over the walls, canals, staircases, lattices, and physical obstacles which bar your way. Naturally, with an escort in tow, you can’t just hyperjump a straight line. I mean, that would be too easy. The dialog with the spammer, her protector, and their security staff at the end is entertaining; make sure to talk to everyone before and after dropping her off.
5. Link Death
With the collective wrath of hackers trashing the network infrastructure of Great Wall Security, they’re weak. This means it’s the right time to hit them hard, and Mr. Akayama directs you to an outpost of Exiles in their service. After they’ve been laid waste, you find a cell phone, whose recent calls direct you to a larger Great Wall Security office. When we rolled in, there were around a dozen (!) Great Wall uniforms waiting, ranging in level from 50-52 (and this mish was on medium!). This led to a long, hard fight, reminiscent of some fights with massed simulacra in Pandora Box missions.
At the end, Mr. Akayama is thrilled. He’s been able to deal Great Wall a deep, lasting blow in his region. And he effuses at your great success! He invites you to “stop by my restaurant some day: the Paper Tiger. Your abilities and initiative are truly commendable, and you may be able to find further employment for them through the influential patrons who frequent my humble establishment”. Mighty warm words from a lasting friend, and word of mouth advertising like this is something that money can’t buy. I’m making my reservations tomorrow.
Conclusion: After so many missions where the Exiles mixed thanks with scorn, or paid me off dismissively, or nagged during and after missions, it was a pleasure to find someone appreciative. Nonetheless, the apparent bugs in missions 2 and 3 were truly annoying.
Thanks go to Xboxster, Stanislava, AgtWeezer, and Sattakan for their help with these missions. I doubt I could have finished it at all without their help. And even if I had, it would not have been nearly as much fun.
This review may be found sat manifoldmischief.blogspot.com, along with dozens of other reviews and writings relevant to MxO.
Friday, May 04, 2007
Sugar Shack 57: The Seamstress
The Seamstress, one of the more sedate, less abrasive Exiles, may be found in Saikung, at 408. -10. -242. She is near the T-intersection, She wears that classic flat black gi, with Agent Pace hair and dark eyes. Tragically, the white boots spoil the effect, and really, she should know better. She seemed serene but watchful on the corner, under a red, un-Sati-ed sky, as twitchy pigeons picked at bits of dried rice on the ground. To either side, books were arranged temptingly on tables, idle pages adrift in the faint breeze. Further off, some Gold Bloods idled, perhaps awaiting their afternoon hsiu-hsi break. A bystander advised me to go see the pandas at the city zoo. “They’re cute!”.
1. Dressed for Success
“Why don’t you just look previous!” she gushed when I got her attention, immediately following with “Could use a little change in your wardrobe though”. After my icy silence, she sighed and explained that she needed a package of fabric picked up and delivered but is short on help. This first part is simple; traipse over and talk to one Gayle Clark. Gayle laments the delay and in convenience in a very, umm, unmanly way, and gives you a key to unlock the room holding it. An unexpected Elite Guard inside challenges you; apparently his crew has stolen the material. Clark panics and begs you to retrieve it. “All new designs” he wails.
The second location is entertaining. Full of Elite Guards, all of whom loudly deny any knowledge of the package. They’ve never heard of it. They think I’m in the wrong address, etc. It reminded me of one of the Jeweler’s missions! Finally, of all people, a Merovingian Physician angrily denies any knowledge, and becomes incensed that your doubt her integrity as you nonetheless search the room. The packages falls to the ground, at which point she denies that is the one you were looking for. Nope, no package there! Fortunately, I could just pick it up and leave amid a whirlwind of abuse and bullets; I had worried I would have to fight my way out!
Finally, I dropped off the now-complete package. A Blood Noble kept chasing me on the way, but I ignored him. The recipient is in an office building; make sure to talk to each bluepill; they all have something to say! The final recipient of the package- Cretin Cravenus? Cletus Clavikus?- is in a hurry for you to go. I guess all the guns freaked him out. Not to mention the ghastly colors and styles of the buffed clothes we all wear. Seamstress calls me a doll and pays me in cash! This almost made up for her smarmy dig about my outfit at the outset!
Oddities: What’s so special about the fabric that people are willing to kill for it? Why would a Merovingian Physician have the slightest interest in this?
More oddities: When I approached her for a second mission, she gave me the same one again! What, does this type of thing happen all the time for her?
2. Demanding the Supply
This second mish is fairly easy. The Seamstress has been plagued by “rogues and cut-throats”, and needs you to make sure one particular shipment is delivered correctly and completely. Picking up the material is a breeze, and your client phones you to say she hopes you aren’t “ambushed and brutally beaten”, like the last one. Well, that makes two of us!
When you arrive at the office of the shipment’s recipient, she demurs to accept it until you have cleared out the lurking thugs. They’re a few blood drunks and a couple of elite guards.
The Seamstress adds, at the end, “Remind me to reward you one of these days”. Sure thing, hun. That’s what they all say!
3. Accessory to Murder
Besides high-end fashion, the Seamstress also provides a wide range of accessories, including purses!! Alas, the courier has been waylaid and requires rescue. In this mission, you must first rescue the waylaid courier, named Duboshin, and escort her to the original intended recipient of the shipment. Oh, and get the shipment, too, no small feat when one elite guard sneers, “You ain’t getting this purse back!”. But a woman will do anything for accessories, and soon the prize was in my awed grasp. I took an immediate liking to Duboshin, when unbidden, she gave me some health boosts before fights. My kind of courier! And her level was decent enough that random street mobs did not take her down while I brought her to the customer. A good thing, that.
However, not all was as well as I had expected, as I should have known when I saw the customer hanging out with blood nobles, who, as you may have noticed, seldom affect an interest in high-end fashion. I mean, just look at them. So, as soon as they have the purse, they all set upon me! Like five of them! Eventually my charm and rifle skills wore them down, and an abashed Duboshin stood trembling in front of me, like Aphrodite rising from a sea of blood. She had, it appeared, been in cahoots with these thugs to split the shipment, and disappear. Why they had to fight me to effect this is not entirely clear. But then, I don’t get paid to understand cases, I get paid to crack them!
Anyway, Duboshin meekly follows me, giving me a health boost as we start off. The little slut suck-up! She wound up improbably in Zion’s hands (I guess they are trying to improve the lives of redpills everywhere with better fashion) at an extraction station. I could see the truce in action here; one Zionist joked about me needing a password, assuring me that she had been “just kidding”. Duboshin was understandably glum. And that was it. All this, for a purse…
Conclusion: Major mysteries are being woven here. Why does the Seamstress have the time of day for Zion? Why would Exiles care at all about accessories, especially purses (perhaps this is an intended gift for Persephone)? Why does Zion care about her? How come I couldn’t keep the purse, to better accommodate my own inventory? Why, oh why?
4. Eye of the Needle
Seamstress has caught wind of the location of her last lost shipment, and wants it back right now, before it profits anyone else. The last operative she ent, Porpoise, disappeared, and she sends you to follow in her footsteps, adding, “Oh, and help Porpoise if she’s still alive, I suppose”. Alas, she is not, as you discover in a gunfight. As I contemplated her fallen form, wondering where my own path would take me, the phone rang. “Do you feel safe? Search the computer now”. The screen softly glowed, “Seek and ye shall find”. I took and uploaded the map disk, and the final location was relayed to me. Very eerie, this was.
This led me to a scenic apartment, wherein waited a couple of drunks and elite guards, all thrilled to see me. They referred to a mysterious second force as I stepped off the elevator. It was the mysterious voice from earlier in the mish. He appeared and thanked me for getting the package for him. Needless to say, I had to kill him too, though he put up a tough fight and did not use his invisibility once, contrary to what you might have expected.
But all bad things must end, and soon I was dropping off the purloined package with a stunned recipient, and counting crisp info-notes from a frowning Seamstress, who reluctantly thanked me and contemplated inviting me to the fashion show soon to be dominated by her designs. But, she quickly corrected herself, “I’d have you get you something decent to wear”. Please! I only dress like this for professional occasions! Give me a chance! But her mind was already whirling elsewhere.
5. The Show Must Go On
This is getting ridiculous! It’s the day of a fashion show, and Seamstress’s designs have been ripped off yet again! Naturally time is more of the essence than usual here. Seamstress sent me to a cool CEO who demanded that I kill all the thieves, not sparing a single one. She was quite adamant about this. After talking to her, be sure to check out the other, adjacent rooms; in one I found a Zionist Rifleman being directed through movements by two fashion-show workers!! He must have been prepping for the next sexiest redpill contest. I soon found myself fighting five or six or seven elite guards for control of an apartment, in which I found not package with the designs, but a packet of plans!
Bugged: Alas, dear readers, this mission was bugged, and I was only able to get beyond after
many efforts. Here’s what happened. On the building floor housing the thieves, you find three elite guards in one room, a couple of lupines in another, and a final lupine in a third. I killed all three elite guards in the room, but soon after I left, when I came back, there were only two bodies. I did not notice any such discrepancy with the other rooms o’ thieves. This was repeatable. I’m guessing this has something to do with the thieves not showing as having been all killed. Nonetheless, I took the packet and uploaded it, but could not get to the next stage of the mish. The “Kill all thieves” box remained unchecked. I went back to the mission area: no thieves there. I hung around, I danced, I stood and afked…nothing. Maybe in the next patch.
That’s where things were for days and days. Then I tried again, and found that if I killed all three of the elite guards in the same room, this section of the mish completed and I could move on. After uploading the plans, I found myself confronting the tough CEO I has seen earlier. Only her goals had changed in the meantime. And soon I had found another instance of the same bug: everyone around me dead on the floor, yet the mish demanded more. It was enough. I took the package, dropped it in front of the Seamstress, and left. “This one’s on the house,” I said, changing out of my killing clothes, and back into something more human.
Conclusion: Some humorous touches to this group of missions gave them special pleasure to run. At the same time, the improbability of rough-and-tumble Exiles fighting so hard for purses and accessories makes one gasp. Perhaps if there had been a hint of someone else showing interest in the outcome, such as the Weaver or Persephone or Hummingbird, this might make more sense. Or if the clothes had some special buffs or special background, then the frenzy might not seem so odd. Still, they’re worth doing. And the last mission is worth debugging!
1. Dressed for Success
“Why don’t you just look previous!” she gushed when I got her attention, immediately following with “Could use a little change in your wardrobe though”. After my icy silence, she sighed and explained that she needed a package of fabric picked up and delivered but is short on help. This first part is simple; traipse over and talk to one Gayle Clark. Gayle laments the delay and in convenience in a very, umm, unmanly way, and gives you a key to unlock the room holding it. An unexpected Elite Guard inside challenges you; apparently his crew has stolen the material. Clark panics and begs you to retrieve it. “All new designs” he wails.
The second location is entertaining. Full of Elite Guards, all of whom loudly deny any knowledge of the package. They’ve never heard of it. They think I’m in the wrong address, etc. It reminded me of one of the Jeweler’s missions! Finally, of all people, a Merovingian Physician angrily denies any knowledge, and becomes incensed that your doubt her integrity as you nonetheless search the room. The packages falls to the ground, at which point she denies that is the one you were looking for. Nope, no package there! Fortunately, I could just pick it up and leave amid a whirlwind of abuse and bullets; I had worried I would have to fight my way out!
Finally, I dropped off the now-complete package. A Blood Noble kept chasing me on the way, but I ignored him. The recipient is in an office building; make sure to talk to each bluepill; they all have something to say! The final recipient of the package- Cretin Cravenus? Cletus Clavikus?- is in a hurry for you to go. I guess all the guns freaked him out. Not to mention the ghastly colors and styles of the buffed clothes we all wear. Seamstress calls me a doll and pays me in cash! This almost made up for her smarmy dig about my outfit at the outset!
Oddities: What’s so special about the fabric that people are willing to kill for it? Why would a Merovingian Physician have the slightest interest in this?
More oddities: When I approached her for a second mission, she gave me the same one again! What, does this type of thing happen all the time for her?
2. Demanding the Supply
This second mish is fairly easy. The Seamstress has been plagued by “rogues and cut-throats”, and needs you to make sure one particular shipment is delivered correctly and completely. Picking up the material is a breeze, and your client phones you to say she hopes you aren’t “ambushed and brutally beaten”, like the last one. Well, that makes two of us!
When you arrive at the office of the shipment’s recipient, she demurs to accept it until you have cleared out the lurking thugs. They’re a few blood drunks and a couple of elite guards.
The Seamstress adds, at the end, “Remind me to reward you one of these days”. Sure thing, hun. That’s what they all say!
3. Accessory to Murder
Besides high-end fashion, the Seamstress also provides a wide range of accessories, including purses!! Alas, the courier has been waylaid and requires rescue. In this mission, you must first rescue the waylaid courier, named Duboshin, and escort her to the original intended recipient of the shipment. Oh, and get the shipment, too, no small feat when one elite guard sneers, “You ain’t getting this purse back!”. But a woman will do anything for accessories, and soon the prize was in my awed grasp. I took an immediate liking to Duboshin, when unbidden, she gave me some health boosts before fights. My kind of courier! And her level was decent enough that random street mobs did not take her down while I brought her to the customer. A good thing, that.
However, not all was as well as I had expected, as I should have known when I saw the customer hanging out with blood nobles, who, as you may have noticed, seldom affect an interest in high-end fashion. I mean, just look at them. So, as soon as they have the purse, they all set upon me! Like five of them! Eventually my charm and rifle skills wore them down, and an abashed Duboshin stood trembling in front of me, like Aphrodite rising from a sea of blood. She had, it appeared, been in cahoots with these thugs to split the shipment, and disappear. Why they had to fight me to effect this is not entirely clear. But then, I don’t get paid to understand cases, I get paid to crack them!
Anyway, Duboshin meekly follows me, giving me a health boost as we start off. The little slut suck-up! She wound up improbably in Zion’s hands (I guess they are trying to improve the lives of redpills everywhere with better fashion) at an extraction station. I could see the truce in action here; one Zionist joked about me needing a password, assuring me that she had been “just kidding”. Duboshin was understandably glum. And that was it. All this, for a purse…
Conclusion: Major mysteries are being woven here. Why does the Seamstress have the time of day for Zion? Why would Exiles care at all about accessories, especially purses (perhaps this is an intended gift for Persephone)? Why does Zion care about her? How come I couldn’t keep the purse, to better accommodate my own inventory? Why, oh why?
4. Eye of the Needle
Seamstress has caught wind of the location of her last lost shipment, and wants it back right now, before it profits anyone else. The last operative she ent, Porpoise, disappeared, and she sends you to follow in her footsteps, adding, “Oh, and help Porpoise if she’s still alive, I suppose”. Alas, she is not, as you discover in a gunfight. As I contemplated her fallen form, wondering where my own path would take me, the phone rang. “Do you feel safe? Search the computer now”. The screen softly glowed, “Seek and ye shall find”. I took and uploaded the map disk, and the final location was relayed to me. Very eerie, this was.
This led me to a scenic apartment, wherein waited a couple of drunks and elite guards, all thrilled to see me. They referred to a mysterious second force as I stepped off the elevator. It was the mysterious voice from earlier in the mish. He appeared and thanked me for getting the package for him. Needless to say, I had to kill him too, though he put up a tough fight and did not use his invisibility once, contrary to what you might have expected.
But all bad things must end, and soon I was dropping off the purloined package with a stunned recipient, and counting crisp info-notes from a frowning Seamstress, who reluctantly thanked me and contemplated inviting me to the fashion show soon to be dominated by her designs. But, she quickly corrected herself, “I’d have you get you something decent to wear”. Please! I only dress like this for professional occasions! Give me a chance! But her mind was already whirling elsewhere.
5. The Show Must Go On
This is getting ridiculous! It’s the day of a fashion show, and Seamstress’s designs have been ripped off yet again! Naturally time is more of the essence than usual here. Seamstress sent me to a cool CEO who demanded that I kill all the thieves, not sparing a single one. She was quite adamant about this. After talking to her, be sure to check out the other, adjacent rooms; in one I found a Zionist Rifleman being directed through movements by two fashion-show workers!! He must have been prepping for the next sexiest redpill contest. I soon found myself fighting five or six or seven elite guards for control of an apartment, in which I found not package with the designs, but a packet of plans!
Bugged: Alas, dear readers, this mission was bugged, and I was only able to get beyond after
many efforts. Here’s what happened. On the building floor housing the thieves, you find three elite guards in one room, a couple of lupines in another, and a final lupine in a third. I killed all three elite guards in the room, but soon after I left, when I came back, there were only two bodies. I did not notice any such discrepancy with the other rooms o’ thieves. This was repeatable. I’m guessing this has something to do with the thieves not showing as having been all killed. Nonetheless, I took the packet and uploaded it, but could not get to the next stage of the mish. The “Kill all thieves” box remained unchecked. I went back to the mission area: no thieves there. I hung around, I danced, I stood and afked…nothing. Maybe in the next patch.
That’s where things were for days and days. Then I tried again, and found that if I killed all three of the elite guards in the same room, this section of the mish completed and I could move on. After uploading the plans, I found myself confronting the tough CEO I has seen earlier. Only her goals had changed in the meantime. And soon I had found another instance of the same bug: everyone around me dead on the floor, yet the mish demanded more. It was enough. I took the package, dropped it in front of the Seamstress, and left. “This one’s on the house,” I said, changing out of my killing clothes, and back into something more human.
Conclusion: Some humorous touches to this group of missions gave them special pleasure to run. At the same time, the improbability of rough-and-tumble Exiles fighting so hard for purses and accessories makes one gasp. Perhaps if there had been a hint of someone else showing interest in the outcome, such as the Weaver or Persephone or Hummingbird, this might make more sense. Or if the clothes had some special buffs or special background, then the frenzy might not seem so odd. Still, they’re worth doing. And the last mission is worth debugging!
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